Charlee plays in my group, on Black Knight: Sword of Rage (or as I would like to call it, S-word of Rage).
At our last league night, we embarked on the second set of banks, known as “Hobbes” (Bank 3) and “Spinoza” (Bank 4). Thomas Hobbes was a 17th century English philosopher known for his social contract theory, particularly its basis in his conception of the state of nature as “nasty, brutish, and short,” which very well describes almost every game I had playing on this bank. Sadly, no social contract could save me from one of my worst league nights in ages and I can only draw some solace from the existence of drop nights. “Spinoza” sounds like the name that Gottlieb would have trademarked for some ill-considered spinner gizmo in 1992, but it is actually Baruch Spinoza, a 17th century Portuguese-Dutch rationalist.
Abby takes her turn on Uncanny X-Men.
The night was enhanced by returning visitors and a new player. My friend Jake, who played in some of the earliest league seasons, made a guest appearance. I knew he was coming but had been made to promise not to tell Joseph so Jake would be able to surprise him. Later I heard the sound of Christy’s voice coming from downstairs so I went down to demand to know why she wasn’t playing in league. She reminded me (to my embarrassment) that she had already told me she would not be able to play this season but hopes to return in the fall.
A group of likely-looking characters.
The new player was Abby D., whom I know well from Belles and Chimes Grand Rapids. She has played in some tournaments at The Avenue, but had not played in the league before. In fact, she told me she had never played in any multi-week league before. I’m a big fan of the league format and hope she will enjoy it too.
David writes a score down.
Only half of the results for each bank are currently in, but right now Brian K. has the lead on Hobbes, with Danny in second and Tim in third. On Spinoza, Devon has the top spot, and there is a tie between Jason and Derik for second and third.
Smackdown winner Derik and B division champ Joseph.
Our Tuesday Night Smackdown game was on Iron Maiden, which returned to the Avenue after a long absence, replacing Willy Wonka (sorry Joseph). Derik won the Smackdown championship and Joseph won the B division on The Mandalorian.
I’ll be seeing everyone very soon at our next league night, when we’ll finish up banks 3 and 4!
Our league night on January 27 wrapped up the first bank rotation, consisting of the banks named “Kant” and “Descartes,” the two philosophers who ended and started the Early Modern period, respectively. Stephanie asked, given I have made reference to owning a “Kant Touch This” T-shirt, why I didn’t wear it. I had thought of it that day, and then realized I already played Kant during the first league night and would be playing Descartes now, so it wouldn’t match. I probably should have done it anyway.
Chris plays Game of Thrones.
We had a couple of new players join this time. One was Karrah, who previously played in a Lightning Flippers tournament. She did not realize league was going on but Stephanie spotted her and asked her to join, which she did by joining in on the last game with that group and then finishing the rest of the bank on her own. Greg, who previously played in part of a league season a couple years back, also made a return. Greg was very enthusiastically talking up Danny’s abilities to me – as though I needed a reminder! The last time I played A division in LPL, Danny is the one who took me out when I brought a knife to an H-bomb fight on Rush.
Linda plays TMNT, which she is undoubtedly thrilled about.
At one point I wandered over to Derik and asked what I thought of the new league logo I had commissioned from a graphic designer. He said “pretty sweet” but obviously knew that I was leading up to asking about T-shirts. We are currently planning to get shirts done soon and just need to work out acquiring some art assets from Pinball Pete’s so we can include their sponsorship.
Either I was being arty, or Devon released so much energy playing Godzilla that it caused local disturbances to reality.
Now that the two banks are complete, we can declare the winners on them. Joseph held on to his top position on Bank 1 “Kant” (and I kept my #2, because Joseph always has to one-up me). Danny took top honors on Bank 2, “Descartes,” ahead of Brian K. Right now there is still no way to declare an overall frontrunner because everyone drops two nights, so we’re all tied for first. Get your screenshot in now!
Our Tuesday Night Smackdown game was Godzilla, and the random number generator chose TMNT as the B division game, because of course it did. Anytime it can pick TMNT, it does. Tim was our Smackdown Champion and Joseph won the B division.
Smackdown champ Tim and B division champ Joseph, both indicating that they are #1.
I’ll be seeing everyone very soon for our next rotation, in which we will be playing Banks 3 and 4, known (to me and maybe Joseph and no one else) as “Hobbes” and “Spinoza.”
Our 24th season opened on January 13 and we had several new players join us. Gabe and Fred, already known to many of us for their great performance at Super-Ball XXIII (the split flipper tournament) and for playing at Silver Balls, officially started with the league. New players Charlee and David also made their debut. Karrah, who previously played in a Lightning Flippers tournament, happened to be around at the end of the night not knowing the league was on, and we invited her to join us and play her games late.
Derik attacking Mars. What’d they ever do to him?
We reorganized the banks this season to account for the games’ new physical positions and also to change up the order a bit from last season. The banks also received new names. Last season they were ancient Greek philosophers, and this season the banks moved forward a couple millennia and took on the names of early modern philosophers. There is at least one game that is supposed to reflect something about each philosopher in the banks, except poor Berkeley who just ended up with the remaining bank after I assigned all the other names. Our first two nights we’re playing “Kant” and “Descartes,” the two philosophers who are considered to end and start the early modern period, respectively.
We had a big change to Tuesday Night Smackdown this season which is that I am requiring all scores to be put in on Matchplay rather than written down, to save time organizing things at the end of the night. There is also a new rule that you have to be present and ready to play when I hold the Smackdown finals. I will be calling your name three times with the megaphone and if you do not show up you’ll be disqualified. This is to save time on my running around the bar finding everyone as we get to the end of the night.
Mackenzie on Stranger Things.
Right now the overall standings show everyone tied for 1st, which will be the case until after the third night, since everyone drops their two lowest. The current bank standings also don’t mean too much until everyone has finished playing both banks after tonight’s meeting. I felt like I had a great night on Bank 1, “Kant,” appropriate because I wrote my dissertation on Kant. I bragged about my night (especially my big John Wick game) to Joseph who was too polite to respond by telling me he had beaten my John Wick score and, as it turns out, my entire bank score. Joseph took first so far on Bank 1, and I got second, above third place Danny Clark (how did that happen?). On Bank 2, “Descartes,” the champ-so-far is Brian K., followed by Tim and Peter.
Smackdown B division winner Devon “The Pinball Wizard” and champion Derik “The Red.”
Some amusement (for others) and embarrassment (for me) happened when I could not seem to get my megaphone working, and then it turned out that I had somehow put it in a recording mode. After that, every time I tried to push the button to turn it on, I instead regaled the bar with me yelling “It’s on but nothing seems to be happening,” which caused some mirth in the bar.
Our Tuesday Night Smackdown was on The Addams Family, with the B division playing on Monster Bash, appropriately enough. Derik took the champion title for the night and Devon was the undercard winner.
Our next night is just in a couple of hours now, so come early if you’d like to start qualifying in the Smackdown tournament, but be careful because I’m hearing the roads are not great!
The playoffs came to a quicker, but still late finale for Season 23 as #1 seed Danny C. defeated #3 seed Tim to defend his LPL championship. Unlike the two-round final match of Season 22, Danny needed only one round to secure the win. Meanwhile, #1 seed Heather defended her Season 22 B division title 2-1 against #3 seed Dan N. Both divisions had the same first and second place finishes as the previous season, but a different third.
The A division podium pose with their trophies: Joseph, Tim, and Danny C.
The playoffs got off to a hectic start as TD Heather arrived at the very last minute due to being held up at work in Mt. Pleasant. She apologized for being flustered as she began rattling off the instructions for the tournament. At the end of the preliminaries, assistant TD Joseph sat down by her and declared his intention to forfeit, allegedly to better manage traffic. Heather replied with her suspicion that this was actually intended to allow her to move up into A division as she was just below the cutline, and insisted that as TD she was refusing to allow him to forfeit, although this is not in fact within the scope of her authority as a TD. After some argument, Joseph eventually agreed to play, which was evidently a good choice since he finished third, his highest finish since 2017.
Taking home hardware in B division are Devon, Heather, and Dan.
Danny’s journey to the top started with a 2-1 win against #8 seed Peter, the only person besides Tim to give Danny a loss. Danny then swept #5 seed Joseph into the second-chance bracket, followed by his first matchup against Tim, whom he defeated 2-1. He then had his long wait while the second-chance bracket played out.
After being knocked into the second-chance bracket, Joseph went on to win against #6 seed Derik 2-0 and then to achieve a major upset by defeating #2 seed Brian K, also 2-0. This set up a semi-finals match between Joseph and Tim, which Tim won 2-1.
Mackenzie plays Godzilla.
Danny and Tim’s match started with Danny’s choice, King Kong. Danny won, so Tim had next choice and choice Game of Thrones. Tim proceeded to completely light up Game of Thrones, ending ball 1 with a score of about 1.8 billion. Danny had a very disappointing ball 1 and so, in a surprising move, he chose to forfeit the game and move on. The game choice moved to Danny who pulled out his ace, Godzilla. Danny finished close to a billion, and Tim made up a lot of ground on ball 3 but ended up a couple hundred million short, ending the finals at around 12:45 am, to the TD’s relief.
Dan plays Indiana Jones.
With A division limited to 8 people the past two seasons, B division has become a larger bracket. This season, 11 people played in the B playoffs, giving several players a bye. Heather started out by sweeping #9 seed Linda into the second-chance bracket and then faced off against Mackenzie. In the second game of the match, Mackenzie chose Godzilla and, as player 1, ended with over 130 million points. Heather was lagging behind severely at that stage and had very little set up, but managed to get Mecha and Godzilla multiball on the last ball. During what seemed like a very good Godzilla multiball, Heather was waiting for the scores to come back up on the screen due to believing herself close to overtaking Mackenzie, when the game started to behave strangely, first killing the music and then several seconds later the flippers. It then totally reset, and did not preserve the game scores. Heather called Joseph (as the backup TD) who referred to a clause in the written rules that state that estimated scores should never be used in case of a catastrophic malfunction, and ruled that both players should completely replay the game. This time Mackenzie finished with over 180 million and Heather was once again in a deep hole. Heather proceeded to start three multiballs during her third ball. The first two were merely adequate but the last one, Bridge Attack MB, was stacked with a mode and that was the push that allowed her to overtake Mackenzie’s score.
Danny watches Tim play King Kong in the final match.
Heather then played her old rival Dan N. and won 2-0. In the second-chance bracket, Dan played #2 seed Devon 2-1. It was their second match, since Dan was the one who sent Devon down into the lower bracket. Dan won again 2-1, sending Devon home with the third place trophy.
In B finals, Heather led by choosing Tron, and it did not work out for her, as she took her first game loss in the tournament. Heather got another choice and went with Scared Stiff, which she won. Choice went to Dan, who picked Foo Fighters. Heather won the game and thus the B division tournament.
Season 23 of the Lansing Pinball League is now in the books. The post-season split flipper tournament variously known as the Super-Ball or Zen Tournament, a tradition dating back to Season 1, will take place today.
Our last league night was a mere two days before Thanksgiving, but the proximity to the holiday did not keep many people away. No, everyone was too eager to secure the best seed they could. For those of us scrambling for the last position in A division it made for an exciting (and some might say too exciting) night. As one of that group, I confess to still being bitter about squandering an otherwise good season on a terrible final night. As you can see, I was so preoccupied with trying and failing not to try and fail that I didn’t take any photos all night.
Joseph, on the other hand, showed me up as usual by having amazing finishes on both of the last two banks and leapfrogging into 5th place. He was the top scorer on Bank 7 (“Pythagoras”) and Danny was the winner of Bank 8 (“Thales”) and the overall winner of the qualifying season, followed by Brian and then Tim.
Meanwhile, Peter passed me to get the final, eighth position in A division. I will once again be the top B division seed, though it was not a fair contest for Devon, who, I’m sad to say, was forced by a family emergency to leave suddenly.
Our Smackdown game was Dungeons and Dragons, chosen by Joseph when he realized I had accidentally set the Smackdown game to be Scared Stiff, which we were playing in league that night. When it came time to randomly draw a nearby game for the B division arena, the RNG picked… Scared Stiff. The Smackdown champion was Mike and despite my sour mood at this point in the night I managed to pick my crumpled pride up off the floor and dust it off enough to have a good Scared Stiff for the B division win.
BFFs me and Mike celebrating our Smackdown wins. Thanks to Joseph for taking the sole league photo of the night.
The qualifying season is in the books and tonight we’ll be having our playoffs to determine final positions for season 23. Qualified players must check in by 7 pm to avoid disqualification from the tournament. See you very soon!
Last league night was meeting #7 which means that we started our final bank rotation between “Pythagoras” and “Thales.” The race is really close around the A/B cut line, so tensions are running high for the players clustered there. We needed to vote to determine which game to take up the final slot in Bank 8, Foo Fighters or Star Wars (both games having been played by only half the league due to backups getting switched in mid-rotation). As usual there wasn’t a high voter turnout, but Foo Fighters won by a mini-landslide. (Star Wars will be the backup game if needed during Week 8.)
Jason plays the new Star Wars: Fall of the Empire.
Once again I came rushing in at the last minute due to having an Academic Senate meeting. We were in the second round of a contentious discussion that had started at the previous Senate meeting and the discussion still didn’t finish. It’s going to be going into round three tomorrow, so everyone should expect Joseph to be checking people in again. The good news for my rivals at the bottom of A division is that I will once again probably not get any warmup time.
Devon plays the Smackdown game, Rush.
At this point, the standings in the banks aren’t very meaningful, since only half of the league has played each won. But so far on Bank 7 (Pythagoras) Mike is in first, which has done a lot toward moving him up in the rankings, having been held back by a couple of missed nights this season. Jason is in the lead so far on Bank 8 (Thales). Down in the cut line cluster, Joseph, Heather, and Devon are in seventh through ninth places, and only 5 points separate Joseph and Devon, so our positions are all very tenuous. Even Mike is only four more points ahead of Joseph.
Gary, Tim and Danny share a moment.
Too many power players being drawn into the same group along with some very high scores (like billion-plus games on Deadpool for Danny and on Jaws for Brian) made for an especially long league night and a late starting Smackdown game. Unfortunately for my school-night bedtime, the Smackdown game was also a long one on Rush. Jason triumphed over Danny, Joseph, and Devon to win. Meanwhile, I won in the B division on Munsters by pulling out a third ball rally that got me from around a million to around 13 million points on my final ball.
Smackdown champion Jason (trying to levitate) and B winner Heather (me)..
That’s it for the recap from last week, but we did also have two other events recently: the women’s and open launch parties for our new Star Wars: Fall of the Empire LE. Tim won both tournaments, making them the first ever Lansing double launch party winner!
For several years starting in 2015, the LPL had an annual Halloween costume contest. While nothing ever topped the first year in which three people came as Chris Tabaka (only one of whom was, in fact, Chris Tabaka), it had a pretty good turnout for a few years before petering out. After only a couple of people participated one year, I decided there was no longer enough interest and put it on hiatus.
Front row from left: Mackenzie as Britney, Lexi as Hornet (Silksong), Stephanie as Cowboy Furby, me as a jackalope, Tim as the pinball witch, and Peter as King Kong (the pinball machine). In the back: Traci as Martha Overhead from Beetlejuice, Danny as Michael Myers, Joseph as a red panda, Christy as a Hershey Kiss, Jason as a luchador, and Linda as “Big Penny” the Pennsylvania Avenue RR bridge. 1st place: Peter, 2nd place: Linda, 3rd place: Mackenzie. Photo by Mark Cutler.
This year, a combination of the passage of time and the closeness of league night to the holiday made me think it might be successful if I gave it another try, so I bought a few small trophies for it and hoped. Unfortunately, that day I was up at work for an unusually lively Academic Senate meeting that ran past 5 pm, and then had to rush home and change into my jackalope costume, causing me to be the last person to arrive on scene, while Joseph got things organized. He had texted me with “I think you’re going to be pleased with the turnout for the costume contest,” but I didn’t see the message because I didn’t look at my phone in the rush to get dressed and over to the Avenue. Instead I was delightfully surprised by the crowd of costumes I saw upon arrival. This was the most participation since the first year, and probably at least as much. I hope we’re able to keep things rolling with it next year, too!
Mike and Traci vote in the costume contest.
The first person who came up to me was someone in a gorilla mask and I had to ask, “Who is that?” It was Peter and I quickly realized he was dressed not as King Kong but as the King Kong pinball machine, complete with a playfield-art T-shirt and a “Go Ape Again” light hanging around his waist. (Later, Mike said to me, “Don’t ask him where his center post is.”) I knew pretty much immediately that he was going to win the costume contest vote, which made me feel rather silly when I announced that I would not be keeping the prize translite if I happened to win the vote. In my defense, I had been one of the top vote getters most years in the past when the participation was usually lower, so I hadn’t anticipated how many other people would put real effort into it this time. Indeed, with everyone marking a first, second, and third place vote (3/2/1 points), Peter won by a landslide and earned a Stranger Things translite along with his trophy. Second place went to Linda as “Big Penny,” the Pennsylvania Avenue Railroad Bridge; and third place went to Mackenzie as Britney Spears. I did a recount of 2-4th place because they were so close that I wanted to be sure. Taking honorable mention, one vote shy of third, was Stephanie as Cowboy Furby.
Danny as Michael Myers plays John Wick. Joseph is in the background doing the “standing up and raising paws” thing that red pandas do to try to look intimidating.
Christy brought some cute witch’s hat and pumpkin shaped cookies, and someone (I didn’t see who because of my late arrival but I’m guessing it might have been Tim) brought candy. It was a wonderfully festive league night and I was so pleased that everyone agreed to indulge my love of Halloween and dressing up.
Peter as King Kong the pinball machine, with his costume contest trophy.
Oh yes, some pinball also got played. It ended up being a very late night because Deadpool got pulled for a malfunction after one group had already played it. Worse, the group that had played it included Brian K., who had put up over 700 million on a game that would now be voided. Sorry, Brian. With the bank 5/6 rotation complete, Danny has won both banks and is the current frontrunner in the overall standings, 12 points ahead of Brian K. On the other end of A division, there is currently a scrum going on to be above the cutline. Currently the line falls between Devon in 8th and Mike in 9th (both of them hampered by missed nights this season).
Since it was costume night, I decided to make Monster Bash the Smackdown game instead of doing a random drawing, and made The Addams Family the B division game. Tim won the Smackdown and Joseph won the B division against Lexi.
Smackdown B division winner Joseph (doing the red panda pose) and winner Tim.
Our next league night (tonight) will start the final two banks, 7 and 8, including most of the games that have not been played yet, or have been played by only half the league, due to being pulled as backup games earlier this season. There wasn’t enough room in the banks to include “old” Star Wars (which got pulled mid-rotation), but it will be the designated backup game if we do need to pull anything tonight.
Our last league night was the fifth of the season and we began the Bank 5/Bank 6 rotation. Bank 5 is named for Socrates, who needs no introduction. Bank 6 takes its name from pre-Socratic philosopher Anaximander, who along with Bank 8’s Thales is a member of the Milesian School. Philosophers from this school were particularly concerned with finding the fundamental origin or principle of all reality, which they often identified with one particular “element.” Anaximander had a particularly abstract version of this, identifying the fundamental principle with something called the apeiron, which is translated “boundless” or “indefinite.” I promise that each bank has some reason I connected that philosopher with that bank. Unfortunately, I can’t swear that I remember what my reason was in each case and Anaximander might be one of those cases…
Peter, Devon, and Curtis watch Joseph and Tim play Smackdown finals games.
Speaking of banks, we had originally created the banks this season with the idea of maximally spreading out the groups, so they were entirely based on game location. Sadly, the best laid schemes of league directors go oft astray, and our nice, neat banks have been overturned by the plough of a new game. When Star Wars: Fall of the Empire came in, Derik also did a fair bit of rearranging. While I lament our banks being in disarray, I do like the way he has put a lot of our Bally/Williams games together in a murderer’s row.
Everyone was happy to see a familiar face at league night: Cyndi has returned, maybe just for a night and maybe for the rest of the season. I believe I speak for everyone in the league in hoping for the latter.
Peter and Tim celebrating a B and A division Smackdown win (respectively).
It’s our tradition to use any newly arrived game for our Tuesday Night Smackdown side tournament, so this time it was the new Star Wars: Fall of the Empire LE. Tim won the A division, and Peter won the B division on Scared Stiff (appropriate for Halloween season).
Speaking of spooky, our annual Fear and Trembling Charity Pingolf Tournament happened the following Tuesday. This year, Joseph and I drew the nine games for the course randomly, to stop us from falling back on the games we’ve used in the past. Some of the objectives we chose ended up feeling a lot harder at the tournament than they did when we tested them; it happens pretty much every time. I gave away several prizes including a Stern “High Score” embroidered hat. Derik was very enthusiastic about winning it (he declared it “sick”) and put it on right away, despite the fact that he is usually never seen wearing a hat. I tried pointing out that at a pingolf tournament he really shouldn’t be bragging about getting a high score. I’m not sure if he didn’t get the joke I was making or if he just didn’t find it funny, but either way it fell flat and my repeating it three times somehow did not improve it.
Tim went into the tournament as the returning champion, and they managed to pull it off again. Tim is now the four time consecutive champion of Fear and Trembling. Pingolf is evidently Tim’s format… though it doesn’t hurt that one of the games on the course was Getaway.
The 2025 Fear and Trembling Charity Pingolf Tournament, supporting the Capital Area Humane Society. From fourth place to first: Joseph, Danny, Derik, and Tim (four-time champion!).
Tomorrow at our next league night, we will be reviving the dormant tradition of the LPL Halloween costume contest. Wear your costume to league night and you might win a trophy or the top prize of a translite! Christy is bringing Halloween cookies. See you there!
September 23 was the fourth night of Season 23 which means that we finished the rotation between banks 4 and 5, known as Democritus and Heraclitus after two pre-Socratic philosophers. Their traditional epithets are “the Laughing Philosopher” and “the Weeping Philosopher” respectively, but whether the night left someone laughing or weeping didn’t seem to correlate with the bank. For my part, I had a much better time with Heraclitus than Democritus, which suits me fine, given that Heraclitus is my favorite pre-Socratic. Heraclitus is also known as the philosopher who said that fire was the fundamental principle of the universe, so that must be why I had a hot streak.
Mark, Devon, and Brian.
At one point I got called over to Monster Bash to resolve an issue in which the right flipper button was getting stuck. I did what I have seen other TDs that I respect do in this situation. I hit the button 100 times to see if the problem recurred. Since it didn’t, I said “play on” and left. Minutes later they fetched me to say it happened again and this time I was able to reproduce it. I expressed reluctance to bother Derik about it, and Peter said that he thought it was just gummed up with something sticky. Joseph suggested he could clean it with his hand sanitizer if he had a cleaning tool, so Peter went and got a napkin and folded it up. Peter stood there working on jamming the folded up paper in the crevice around the button, and reported that it was working. He did not notice Derik creeping up behind him and then standing there with an amused “WTF” expression on his face.
Derik silently watches Peter work on the flipper button.
Speaking of WTF, the B division on Tuesday Night Smackdown stole the spotlight from A with a much longer game and a very dramatic finish. Joseph (as player 2) had finished the game on James Bond with 626.7M, and Jason (as player 4) looked almost certain to overtake him. When Jason drained through the left outlane, everyone watching (including, probably, Jason) thought he had won on bonus. The score display was interrupted by a prompt for player 2 to enter initials for the high score board, which I assumed would be followed by a prompt for player 4 to enter them also. Instead, after Joseph finished putting in his JFN, it went to a match screen. A couple of stunned beats followed as people registered what had happened. Jason had finished at 625.8M, less than a million short. Danny, meanwhile, had destroyed everyone with a big game of Ghostbusters in the A division.
Joseph gestures to the amazing close scores on James Bond.Jason just barely failed to eke out enough bonus to beat Joseph.
Having completed League Night #4, we are now at the halfway mark of the season. Brian laughed off his rivals with a win in Democritus (bank 3), while Tim triumphed and left the competition crying in Heraclitus (bank 4). In the overall standings, Brian is at the top with a mere single point lead over Tim. Danny is another three points behind Tim. The cut-line for A division is currently between Joseph in eighth and Devon in ninth, with only two points between them. With half the season left, no one can feel secure. We’ll be starting the second half tonight, and this will also be the last chance for any new joiners for Season 23. After Night #5, new players can still attend but will be recorded as guest players without official standings.
Danny looks nonchalant about his victory in the A division on Ghostbusters, but Joseph still can’t believe what happened on James Bond.
